Just for fun

JILL AND JOY’S WALK           (a poetic true tale by Mo Stanley)

                                                                                                    

walking figurewalking figure

One day J and J went off for a walk,

They needed some time to wander and talk,

They left nearby streets and ventured a while 

Along country lanes and over a stile

They strolled near a golf course 

And watched out for balls 

They enjoyed every moment 

And listened for calls 

Until they began to think 

Time to go home 

But then were unsure 

Of which way to roam 

But as they stood pondering 

A nice man appears 

He saw their distress 

So helped out the (old ) sweet dears 

He rode on a scooter

An official was he 

But the sort of a chap 

You’d invite round to tea

He soon helped out 

And advised them to care 

When venturing by places 

                               Where balls fly in the air !                              

He lead them both safely 

And spoke merrily

So soon they were home 

For a nice cup of tea


By Mo Stanley ( in lock down)

 






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From John Austin, quiz-compiler to  Hasbury Methodist church! Be warned...it'll drive you mad!!!!!!!


As I've been known to write the odd quiz or two, Sarah said I should do something to pass the time while we're in lockdown. I have written a short story about life at the moment, in which there are 19 (topical number) British towns or cities. See how many you can find....


These, as you know, are strange times due to Covid 19. We are under instruction to be in lockdown, with anyone that has a temperature, cough or pains in the chest, erring on the side of caution and staying in self-isolation. Most of us can’t go to work so people are having to do their job at home. We’re having to stay a distance from everyone when we go to the shops, there’s barely anything on the shelves and definitely not much loo roll for sale. Some are catching up on watching the movies they’ve been meaning to see, some are reading the books they haven’t had time to sit and read whilst others are trying something new like painting, cookery or knitting. Seemingly, it does seem easy to do very little. We do have to remember to do those other things; wind on the clocks an hour, send a card if family or friends have a birthday and do the work on the house that we’ve been meaning to do. It is good that we are still allowed to go for a walk or a little trip on our bikes, but those sport fans are finding it unusual that the football has stopped and the six nations rugby hasn’t been completed yet. It was really nice the other evening for people came out to support the NHS, when you could hear the fireworks going bang or the clapping of hands. We can’t go to restaurants or the cinema and people are having to cancel holidays and weddings meaning there will also be no hen-do nor stag-do. We can only hope that everyone will be well soon so that we will all be able to get on with life as normal and you never know we might all be a little bit friendlier and kinder by the end of it all.


ANSWERS

These, as you know, are strange times due to covid 19. We are under instruction to be in lockdown, with anyone that has a temperature, cough or pains in the chest, erring on the side of caution and staying in self-isolation. Most of us can’t go to work so people are having to do their job at home. We’re having to stay a distance from everyone when we go to the shops, there’s barely anything on the shelves and definitely not much loo roll for sale. Some are catching up on watching the movies they’ve been meaning to see, some are reading the books they haven’t had time to sit and read whilst others are trying something new like painting, cookery or knitting. Seemingly, it does seem easy to do very little. We do have to remember to do those other things; wind on the clocks an hour, send a card if family or friends have a birthday and do the work on the house that we’ve been meaning to do. It is good that we are still allowed to go for a walk or a little trip on our bikes, but those sport fans are finding it unusual that the football has stopped and the six nations rugby hasn’t been completed yet. It was really nice the other evening for people came out to support the NHS, when you could hear the fireworks going bang or the clapping of hands. We can’t go to restaurants or the cinema and people are having to cancel holidays and weddings meaning there will also be no hen-do nor stag-do. We can only hope that everyone will be well soon so that we will all be able to get on with life as normal and you never know we might all be a little bit friendlier and kinder by the end of it all.

 

AND THERE'S MORE...............................


HOW THE INTERNET STARTED, ACCORDING TO THE  BIBLE

Please do not Google or check this with Snopes.  They will lie to you.  Trust me! 

 In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a healthy young wife by the name of Dorothy.   And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg.  Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot Com.

And she said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why dost thou travel so far from town to town with thy goods when thou canst trade without ever leaving thy tent?"

And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply said, "How, dear?"

And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between to send messages saying what you have for sale, and they will reply telling you who hath the best price. The sale can be made on the drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."

Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums.  And the drums rang out and were an immediate success.  Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever having to move from his tent.

To prevent neighboring countries from overhearing what the drums were saying, Dot devised a system that only she and the drummers knew.  It was known as Must Send Drum Over Sound (MSDOS), and she also developed a language to transmit ideas and pictures - Hebrew to the People (HTTP).

And the young men did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to camel dung.  They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Sybarites, or NERDS  And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real riches were going to that enterprising drum dealer, Brother William of Gates, who bought off every drum maker in the land. Indeed he did insist on drums to be made that would work only with Brother Gates' drum heads and drumsticks.

And Dot did say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others." And Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel, or eBay as it came to be known.  He said, "We need a name that reflects what we are."

And Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators."  "YAHOO," said Abraham. And because it was Dot's idea, they named it YAHOO Dot Com.

 Abraham's cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious Energetic Educated Kid (GEEK) that he was, soon started using Dot's drums to locate things around the countryside.

It soon became known as God's Own Official Guide to Locating Everything (GOOGLE).

That is how it all began. And that's the truth.

 I would not make up this stuff.